Disney Villains For Justice
AnonymousI was wondering. Do you guys have any advice for people who feel "guilty" when they have sex or sexual thoughts? I'm a cis girl so I know I don't suffer as much as other people, but I grew up in a very I berm conservative household -c-

-C- and was taught a lot of bad things, like I should be “ashamed” for having sexual thoughts, and that I was a “bad” person if I did. This is just something that’s bothered me for most of my life, because I’m 21 now and I try to not feel this way-c-

-c- I really do! And I just feel so dirty and disgusting and I hate myself for it. I’m sorry I know I don’t suffer as much as others but this is an issue that makes me wanna peel off my skin I just feel so /repulsive/.

You aren’t the only one like that. I was raised Catholic. I was one of the kids that wanted to follow every rule and guideline, I still follow orders very well, and I also was harsh on myself if I did anything wrong. When I was a teenager and had sexual thoughts and hormones and all of that fun stuff, I was told it all was a sin, so I fought very hard against myself, I have even wanted to tear off my member because I hated doing those things. I felt like sex and masturbation and all of that was very dirty and disgusting. Those thoughts slowed me down when I had a serious partner, and since we were both religious and were raised in religious families, we both were distraught about this stuff and felt guilty and all of that. But, after pushing myself away from religion, and coming to terms with sex and all of that (it took awhile, trust me. And I still get squeamish when people talk about having sex, for the dirty reason and because I am a bit sex repulsed, which might be a result of the religion). It took me years and it took me going to college to come to terms with this stuff. Through constant thinking about sex, everyone around me having sex, I became a bit desensitized to it and sex felt like an everyday occurrence to me (even though I rarely had it), because it pretty much was. I still get really protective over my friends when they have sex, not really because I think it is dirty, but because I am afraid of them being used for just their bodies, and also they had a lot of sex while drunk.

I don’t know how much advice I can give ya, besides try and get used to it. Tell yourself it is just a normal thing (because it is) and there is nothing wrong with it. If someone calls you dirty they can go fuck themselves (yes I am including this for irony). If you experience sex, remind yourself that you are doing it for you, and you are doing it to share an experience with someone else. If anyone else has advice for this anon, feel free to add.

- Mod Helga

lady-redrum:

wasthatnotsideblog:

just gonna say this: if someone has social anxiety and they ask you something akin to ‘are you mad at me’ or ‘do you hate me’, it isn’t because they don’t trust you, it’s because their brain literally tells them that all the time

it’s not a personal slight, it’s insecurity caused by mental illness

thanks

TAKE NOTE.

My mind does this to me all the time.
- Mod Helga

"It bothers me that no one has the patience to deal with someone who is just sad."
#modHelga    
Shout out to Emma Watson for making a feminist speech that managed to enrage both feminists and anti-feminists.

damniwishidthoughtofabettername:

disneyvillainsforjustice:

That means she is too in the middle for both sides. She is trying to bridge the gap. And for that, both feminists and anti-feminists are pissed off.
- Mod Helga

If she was in the middle, she would come from a totally neutral standpoint. Not try and persuade everyone how fucking brilliant feminism is and that men should be kow-tow to the movement as well. She would have talked about points from both sides, or how feminism could really help guys. This was in no way the middle ground.

When I say “in the middle”, I mean that she recognizes aspects of both sides and is trying to bridge the gap, even if that bridging is mostly to help feminism, she is still paying a lot more attention to men and their issues than the radical feminists that are upset at her. And the anti-feminists are mad because she is “too much of a feminist” and talks much more on feminist issues than male issues. It is a start. It is a step in the right direction. It is a step towards the middle. And since it is a step towards the middle, both extremes are going to be pissed because she agrees with some of what their “enemy” is saying.

- Mod Helga

samaelcarverHonestly, I don't think it's more so that she was trying to bridge the gap that people are angry. I think it's as far as I know from more anti feminist perspective, it was the same sort of rhetoric in a different form.

I feel that she was still bridging the gap a bit. Even if it was very similar rhetoric to other feminist ideas, she still acknowledged men and women as having problems and she wants them to work together. Radical feminists and radical anti-feminists do not want men and women working together. They don’t want anything to do with the other gender. Emma humanized men and women, and the radicals can’t do that and only see their opposite genders as demons. I have seen plenty of radicals get mad when you try to make those in the group they are against look like humans and individuals. They only see them as evil creatures and will attack you for seeing any humanity in them. Trust me. I have had this conversation before. I have pissed people off because I saw certain people as human and that I wanted to treat them like human beings.
- Mod Helga

seraphimaelohimaAs a woman entering the video game industry, i don't think it the responsible OR necessary that anyone else makes the games i want to play/make. They're making their games and I will strive to make the games I want to see, with the (female) characters and roles I want to see. It's not up to anyone but myself to make what I'm interested in and holding people to the same interests doesn't really help anyone, especially not the video game industry. make and play what you want, don't rely on others.

seraphimaelohima:

knightoflodis:

If I could make, I would. But instead I will basically say: this is what I like, and if you make a game with it I am much more likely to purchase said game than otherwise.
If the game doesn’t include something I like, I won’t purchase it. And female protagonists are big points for me. If you make a game with a female protag, I will follow it like mad.

My plan is to make games with many different female characters in many different roles! :P i also want to work with whatever company I am employed at to make more elaborate and varied roles for their female characters, too. But basically I think making new IP is always better than forcing people to change current IP!

say it with me now

emotional

abuse

is

still

abuse

do not fucking tell me someone with abusive parents “had it easy” just because the abuse wasn’t physical or sexual

just don’t

Shout out to Emma Watson for making a feminist speech that managed to enrage both feminists and anti-feminists.

That means she is too in the middle for both sides. She is trying to bridge the gap. And for that, both feminists and anti-feminists are pissed off.
- Mod Helga

Anonymousjust so everyone knows: harboring a runaway is illegal regardless of their homelife

Actually, that’s dependant on the state. From the website “Criminal Defense Lawyer”:

Many states have laws against “harboring” runaway children. Although these laws are not often enforced, assisting a runaway teenager may result in criminal charges for harboring a runaway or contributing to the delinquency of a minor. In other states, the runaway child’s parents can sue another person in civil court for harboring a runaway.

In some states, the following may be illegal or may result in civil liability:

  • encouraging a minor to run away from home
  • providing shelter or transportation to a minor you know has run away
  • allowing a minor who is staying with you to engage in criminal behavior (such as drug use), or
  • lying to a parent or police officer about a child’s whereabouts.

If you are allowing a runaway child to stay with you, you may or may not be able to enroll the child in school or authorize medical treatment on the child’s behalf. If you plan to allow a child to live with you on a long-term basis, you may want to consider a guardianship, explained above.

Additionally, if the child is being abused, it can be reported to the police, who are required to report it to CPS, who is required to investigate.

-QoH

she-who-defied-fateIn response to the asexual awareness post: sex and romance are very real, and I would even go as far as saying that they're *important.* I'm sure aromantics and asexuals can lead otherwise full and satisfying lives, but it's hard to empathize with aromantics and asexuals who get so offended when they're "othered."

voxclara:

disneyvillainsforjustice:

I apologize if I sounded condescending. I just say hun sometimes to people, I realize that my words were formulated badly.

Perhaps. Perhaps I just don’t understand romance at all. I don’t understand romance at all. If that is what romantic attraction is, then so be it. If that is what it is, I appreciate it from a distance then, for I have no desire to date most people that have adorable personalities. I feel like what I want isn’t the same as a romantic relationship, more like a very close sibling. But, eh. I am still figuring everything out and still figuring out what I want.

- Mod Helga

i mean, people are different and want different things out of relationships.

imo “romantic attraction” is really hard to qualify and define; the concept arose in the asexual community to describe what genders asexuals would date without erasing their asexuality, so calling themselves “asexual and heteroromantic/biromantic/homoromantic” (or aromantic if they weren’t interested in dating anyone) instead of “heterosexual/bisexual/homosexual”, and it that context it makes sense, but i think people have tried to turn the idea of romantic attraction into a bigger thing than it is.

i mean, the vast majority of people want to be in “romantic” relationships (in the sense of being a life partner, enjoying physical intimacy - not necessarily sex - together, growing to love a specific person or people above everyone else because of their personality and who they are). but lots of people aren’t very effusive or demonstrative about their love, lots of people don’t like flowers and chocolates and candlelit dinners and passionate declarations of sentiment. but that’s not what “romantic attraction” means and that’s not what “romantic” relationships are. not wanting those things from your primary relationship doesn’t make you (general you) aromantic.

Okay. That makes a lot more sense now. I know that if I get into something like that, it doesn’t need to be mutually exclusive. But, thank you for helping me see better.

In my life I am not really looking for relationships, if they come to me I will let them happen. At the moment, I am partially content just collecting best friends.

- Mod Helga